Food, food culture, food as culture and the cultures that grow our food

Vermin, varmints and my neighbour who votes incorrectly

November 24, 2006

Paros major morbidus, deader than a doornail.

For friends and fambly who received a frantic email, text or who coached me on the phone this morning, here’s an update:

- All dead and feathered animals have been removed from the premises.

- Chernobylicals have been applied to discourage future beasts from entertaining the notion of co-habitation.

bleach rohrshach culiblog
Bleach rohrshach, oddly looks like a bird.

- Barriers have been set up between the interior and exterior of the apartment.

- All utensils, tools and kitchen surfaces have been re-kashered/hallaled short of setting the place on fire.

And just for good measure I donated all of the forgotten pork products to the meat-eating neighbour downstairs who votes incorrectly. Ach, the bacon was way old, and I believe that’s more or less what Jesus would’ve done if he lived upstairs from a Christian ‘Democrat’.
Serves her right, FUQN RIGHT WING HO!

Bring on Pesach, I’m ready as I’ll ever be.

dead urban bird

In case you’re not on the intimi in case of emergencies shortlist, be happy and here’s the poop:

Got back from Newcastle only to find my decorative seed collection in its decorative dessicated fruit skin bowls scattered all over the floor. I thought that maybe my homomouse had thrown a party while the cat was away but then I started finding bird poop. Cleaning up the trail I tried to think about it in a positive light. Maybe it’s good luck, like when a bird poops on your shoulder OUTSIDE…

Poop on a teapot.

Poop on a cd case.

It’s perplexing though, cuz unless you’ve got an opposable thumb and are really into roughage, mine is not a friendly home. I keep all foodstuffs in glass or in the fridge ‘cepting the fruit on the windowsill (untouched), the big sacks of buckwheat that I call pillows (touched), and the purely sculptural moss and weed ikebana (thanks Mom for teaching me ikebana and bedankt friendly farm in friesland). I think it’s fair to assume that the cause of death was the result of what happens when an abundance of roughage meets a bad case of the munchies.

Marijuna ikebana - culiblog
Celebrating Autumn with marijuana ikebana

So last night, when I peered into the cabinet and found a big, huge pile of poop and added that in my head to the other little poops that I had already cleaned up (x 7 carry the 2), I decided to call it a day and reapproach this task after a good night ’s sleep. Cut to this morning, coffee downed, suited up in protective gear, ready for the eventuality of finding living and/or dead varmints in hiding, I started to cleanse. While wondering what the ancestors would have to say about re-kashering a house invaded and pooed upon by an urban bird (they resemble dragons) I was moving the jars around to get some leverage, when I saw the dead bird IN MY CABINET. A LITTLE BIRD DIED IN MY CABINET.



cleansing culiblog
Jewish smetvrees (contamination phobia) dictates that dirty things make other things dirty just by proximity.

What’s puzzling is that although I’m responsible for the deaths of many animals occupying various places on the food chain, the presence of a small, dead animal that I didn’t even kill, makes my toes curl. I was in all states this morning, produced several high-pitched squeals, threw my gloves down and ran to the opposite end of the house to phone people. What’s all that about?

Anywhoozelbees, it’s all cleaned up now and adults are once again welcome.

bird poop on tablecloth culiblog

debra at 21:01 | Comments (2) | post to

Food-related film at the IDFA

November 20, 2006

idfa logo
You would be wise to print this simultaneously with the programme of the Shadow Festival if you want to plan your days and nights between the 21st of November and the 3rd of December 2006.

22 films in this year’s the International Documentary Festival Amsterdam (IDFA) are food-related. 3 of the Shadow Festival’s films are food-related. That’s only 25 films we have to see in just 13 days. Piece of cake.

By food-related I mean films in which food is depicted as being inextricably linked to the cultural narrative. The comprehensive list from the IDFA is in alphabetical order, which I know is crazy, but I’m simply not logistically inclined. I will do my best to see (and review!) a goodly portion of this list. If you want to help me out, let me link to your review, let me interview you because you’re the director of one of these films and / or meet in between the delicious hecticity, drop me a line, we’ll drink a glass of wine.

One film that really captured my heart at last year’s (Feb 2006) Berlinale Film Festival and one which I cannot recommend highly enough is Ben Hopkins 37 Uses For a Dead Sheep. This documentary is exemplary of food-related in the culiblog sense of the word.

(Programme notes cut paste cut courtesy of the IDFA website.)

Thank Gawd for food-related film that is so much more than romantic comedy with gratuitous food porn and gluttony as a metaphor for sexual passion.

debra at 7:40 | Comments (2) | post to

Illustrious guests

November 19, 2006

international art critic Paul Groot inspects the work
International art critic Paul Groot inspects the work. Photo by illustrious guest Joost Bottema used entirely with permission

Turns out we lingered a bit too long on Mateusz Herczka’s phermone exuding garden furniture, but man oh man did we have a good time last night at the sprout restaurant, political differences aside… The enhanced prototype benches exude a human social interaction enhancing hormone that makes you thrilled to be social, sometimes for days afterwards. Case in point, Mademoiselle Blocq and I had a hyper-hard time keeping shtum at yoga today.

testing robots orally
Orally fixated sprout restauranteuse taste-tests the little robots. ‘Tickles!’ Photo by illustrious guest Joost Bottema used entirely with permission

Oh, did I mention that you can weld a robot together after dinner? Menu fixe!

Arjan, Simon en Marlein kijken zeer aandachtig naar een kiempje!
Dutch organic gardening TV star and Amsterdam’s dishiest cake parlour owner slash haute pattissier and Chef Merveilleuse/culiblog covergirl Marlein Overakker scrutinize a micro-green. Photo by illustrious guest Aya van Caspel used entirely with permission

Abital Gomperts eats with her right hand
Sprout-enthusiast and toddler Abital Gomperts shows the brothers how to eat with their right hands

erga kitchen princess
Kitchen Princess Erga (not her real name) transforms each plate into a magical Wundergarten. Sister’s got it all, rosey cheeks, decolletehayhay!

the real stars - the sprouts
The real stars of the evening!

Sprout mash and sausage photo by Aya van Caspel
Bursting with love organic pork sausage, photo by Aya van Caspel

vernacular tupperware
A vernacular design genius keeps the sprouts fresh!

debra at 12:51 | Comments (0) | post to

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